So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
