HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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