She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
