Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Reggie can tackle my bush.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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