dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
