just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
My ATM looks so different sober.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
