Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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