Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
