Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
