He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
