she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize