Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
