That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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