Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
You can't just leave with hair like that
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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