its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
