As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
