Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
