It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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