There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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