Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Randomize
