Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
