If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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