You work out of a Hotel?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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