oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I believe in your delicious
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Randomize
