went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
