I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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