On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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