Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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