Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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