I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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