VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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