on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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