Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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