please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
