Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
