You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
