i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
