HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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