Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
