i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
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