He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize