I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
