careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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