Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize