I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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