Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
