Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
