My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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