Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
