i just google imaged poop.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
