He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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